because I have been depressed
since I heard Eminem is really sick
with pneumonia and heart problems and weight gain.
His music has kept me alive.
Hold on a minute...
I need to test this blog and see if I can get images up to tell the story of how
Eminem, Marshall Mathers, and Slim Shady
became my heroes...
Awesome the internet works.
If it wasn't for Marshall Mathers my movie collection would be totally gay. See proof above.
I have two guitars because if I ever meet Eminem I want to be able to say, "I am a musician too!"
And I wanna serenade him and sing him a love song ~ but I can't even play.
Well I can play the drums but it is hard to serenade a man with a loud ass drum kit between you.
Eminem has been a lifeline to me in my personal life and in my career.
I keep this Rolling Stone cover in my printer whenever I am not printing:
It is my shrine to the master lyricist.
I don't let anything bullshit come out of this printer.
Marshall get better or I will just lose it!
When I work out I imagine Eminem is my personal trainer.
I am gonna write something here
until he is better
because it's all I can do,
because I am a loser.
I can barely keep my shit together
without praying to someone
I don't even know.
He is my Jesus.
And my Jesus got fat.
And I need to save him
so I don't get fat
because the only reason I got in shape in the first place
is because I wanna look super fucking hot
the next time I have a chance to meet him.
And if he is gonna hide in his house
it will never happen.